My friend Lauren was talking to me recently about being stuck in her journey toward buying her first home. She wanted to buy at her pre-approved price, in a certain part of town and she wanted a home with a certain amount of square footage. And no matter how she computed those three variables, there was not an answer. There simply was not a house available in the place, with the space, and at the price she needed.
Professor Keith Devlin, a mathematician, says “the thing about being wrong in mathematics, is there is no way out, other than to accept you are wrong, then figure out why you are wrong and how to correct it.
We mathematicians are constantly reminded that what we feel sure is correct is in fact false, and that it sometimes takes considerable effort to ‘re-wind our mental tape’ to see where we went wrong and embark on a modified, or different approach.
Part of correcting our errors is accepting new facts or information, identifying and recognizing false beliefs or assumptions and then fixing them, or recognizing and then correcting a faulty understanding. In mathematics, we cannot change the facts to match our beliefs. The facts rule.”
The facts for Lauren were not very palatable. She was discouraged and disappointed that this thing she wanted so bad felt so out of reach. She shared with me that she was just going to wait until the facts of the situation changed.
Well, as it happens, I am also a mathematician of sorts. (Just go with it.)
I suggested that she quit fighting the facts and embark on a modified, or different approach.
Professor Devlin goes on to say, “to my mind, being able to recognize when we are wrong, and adjust accordingly, always trying to match the facts available to us – often by seeking out new facts – is the single most valuable life skill to come from being a mathematician. Moreover, mathematics is the only discipline where you simply cannot progress without first accepting that reality, and then following it.”
Lauren could choose to accept the reality of her house-buying situation, and still progress. Great news!
How? She could select the two of her three criteria that were the very most important and let the other one go.
With a new approach, she was able to decide that her first two priorities were space and cost. Period. She would let go of that perfect part of town she was dreaming about. And armed with that internal information, her NEW facts, if you will, she QUICKLY determined exactly which of the homes from all of her previous searches to pursue.
She is, at this moment, no longer stuck and quite happily moving forward.
I can’t wait to hear about what facts you need to accept and how you figured out how to progress anyway. And if you need help with it, I’m your gal.
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